Libby Heartson, UK


Nov 9 2016


Here is my story. It started when my brother was 4 and I was 8. It started with little things like snatching things from me like pencils etc. He had an addiction to chocolate and he basically threatened me saying you either get chocolate from the cupboard for me or I'll smack you. I took the chocolate and when my mum asked who had taken the chocolate my brother instantly blamed me. I took a telling off and was sent to my room. My brother used to sneak chocolate in the middle of the night the next morning I was blamed until one day when we both came out of school. He asked my mum for chocolate and she refused to give it to him. He kicked punched her and when we got home it was even worse. It was as if he was possessed he turned his room upside down. My mum took him to the doctors and was told that his chocolate addiction was that of a drug addicts to drugs. He was taken off chocolate. I knew what would happen if I refused to get him chocolate before his addiction was discovered I would either get kicked or punched pinched or my hair pulled all out of the sight of my parents. The violence towards my parents stopped but not me it continued until my brother was 8 and I was 12 only because my dad listened to me and how he was hurting me. He told me to go in the living room do what I normally do while he watched what would happen. Smack my brother kicked the hell out of me for no reason my dad flew in the living room and he was dragged upstairs. You would have thought this would have stopped him but it didn't he changed tactics and switched to generally annoying me by doing knock and run he would jump on me pin me down even though I was screaming for him to get off me. He also used to call me names and just generally upset me constantly. The only time I ever got peace was when I was at friends houses. My best friends mum who is my foster mum in my eyes and her son along with my grandparents saw him for what he was a nasty spiteful little shite. They protected me from him. Because my parents thought my brother was going to be this big football talent it didn't matter what anyone else said about him there was always the excuse he's just being a little boy. He even started on my foster mum's son. It didn't matter what anybody said to my parents he was just being a little boy and everyone else was being far too sensitive. When I was 16 I lost 3 of the most important people who protected me. My grandmother died when I was 16 and my foster mum's marriage broke down so my best friend his brother and foster mum moved to Kent. The first time I went to stay with my foster mum and brother down in Kent coming home in the car I was sobbing begging her to let me stay because I knew what it was going to be when I got home the same old story more hell for me. I felt alone. When I was 23 I couldn't take it anymore I was in a hell of a state by this time I had been diagnosed with ADHD and my brother still never let off he then isolated me instead. He refused to go to family therapy and he was the sole cause of my pain. A few issues were sorted but not many. I couldn't live there anymore and put up with the way things were. I told my foster mum she either took me in with her or I was going to end it all. I stayed there for 2 weeks came home and looked for somewhere else to live. I had been threatened with being kicked out of my parents house for my aggressive outbursts where my brother had bullied me so much. I moved into a mental health supported housing scheme and told them about the violence etc I had been subjected to along with the emotional and mental abuse from my brother they deemed it was in my best interests to be housed in their scheme. Two days after living there I was deemed as being on the autistic spectrum with Asperger’s. Me and my brother tried working things out when I moved but that wasn't enough. He always knew I wanted to give my parents their first grandchild but he took that from me too. He hadn't even been with his new girlfriend a year and she was pregnant. Her brother is autistic and she understood why I initially reacted badly. She was OK with me. The next day I went to my parents house my brother was there I tried to show an interest but he was nasty to me. I flipped told him a few home truths I made it clear I would tell his girlfriend my view on the matter and he verbally threatened to kill me right in front of both my parents. He even went to hit me and I left. My niece was born on the 6th February 2015. I have never seen or met her. Because my parents refused to buy him tickets to an nfl game for his 21st birthday because they were buying things for his baby he held that against them and his child for over a year. In March this year my grandad died at his funeral my brother agreed to be civil with me but no he pushed me away. I couldn't even go to grandads wake after until they had left not one family member said a word to him about it.
I gave it sometime and asked my parents to ask him where I stood with him. He was asked and he said I want nothing to do with her. It's still making life hard because I am having to isolate myself from family events because he will be attending them. I have tried 4 times prior to my niece being born to sort these issues out with him and I got no response. He once apologised for everything he did to me but a month later he went back to his old tricks so he never has been sorry for what he did to me and never will be. This is my abuse story.

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